Wednesday 4 June 2008

Difference Between the Sexes

After much theorising, I have finally arrived at the simplest way of portraying the difference the sexes.

Let's say a person needs a pencil and needs to ask someone else to get it.

Now, if the former is a man, his instructions will be thus:
"Go to my table. There, under the mass of papers, books, cds and all that, you'll find a pencil. Get it for me, please."

In response, he has to hear:
"This table is FILTHY! Clean it!" "Yeah, okay, now can I have the pencil, please?"
"How're you going to manage with this little thing? It's barely an inch long!" "I'll get, by; now can I please just have the pencil?"

If, however, the former is a woman, the instructions will be as follows:
"Go to my room. In the second cupboard from the right, the keys to which are in the dresser to the left of my bed, there's a green bag. In that bag, there's a turquoise bag. In that bag is another set of keys that'll open the locker of the first cupboard from the left. In that locker, there's a red box. In it are some pencils. Get them please."

In response, the seeker will have one or more of the following doubts:
"There's no green bag in the cupboard!" "Of course there is, I put it there this morning!"
"There are three green bags here!" "No, there's an emerald one, a lime one and a green one!"
"What's turquoise?"
"There are five red boxes in here! Which one is it?"
"Oh, can't you just check and see?"
"I thought you needed a pencil. What am I bringing four for?" "Backup! Oh, and can you get the sharpener and the eraser and the ruler while you're at it?"

1 member protest rally:

Menaka said...

Its completely unfair for you to generalise that way. And please, even i had to read the directions twice to actually place the pencils... (wherever they were)

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