Love = Time.

If you don’t have one, you can’t have the other.

 

I guess majority opinions do win.

Changes are happening

In keeping with the new banner (which, by the way, I still have more plans for), my look has changed also. My hair is now long enough to tie a little pony, which I have been doing for the past two days.

Here are the reactions to the new look:

• You look vaguely Italian
• You look like a Mexican. You look like an Eduardo or a Pablo
• Spanish! Like a matador!
• Dude, you look autistic
• Who is this girl? (This from a person whose seat is behind mine)
• You look like the Federer of old days

Meh. What to believe?

Disconnect.

I’m going to unplug.

Very soon.

I feel it coming.

I’m trying to fight it.

We shall see.

Am I crazy?

It being a lazy Sunday evening and having nothing much to do, I took an online Psychological Disorders test. Here are the results.

		My Score	Web Avg.
Paranoid	||||||	30%	49%
Schizoid	||||||||||||||	58%	53%
Schizotypal	||||||||||||||||||||	86%	53%
Antisocial	||||||||||||	50%	47%
Borderline	||||||	30%	47%
Histrionic	||||||||||||||||||	78%	43%
Narcissistic	||||||||||||||||	70%	41%
Avoidant	||||||	26%	39%
Dependent	||||||||||||||	54%	37%
Obsessive-Compulsive	||||||||||	38%	40%

Paranoid - generally tends to interpret the actions of others as threatening.

Schizoid - generally detached from social relationships, and shows a narrow range of emotional expression in various social settings.

Schizotypal - uncomfortable in close relationships, has thought or perceptual distortions, and peculiarities of behaviour.

Antisocial - shows a pervasive disregard for, and violation of, the rights of others.

Borderline - shows a generalized pattern of instability in interpersonal relationships, self-image, and observable emotions, and significant impulsiveness.

Histrionic - often displays excessive emotionality and attention seeking in various contexts. They tend to overreact to other people, and are often perceived as shallow and self-centred.

Narcissistic - has a grandiose view of themselves, a need for admiration, and a lack of empathy that begins by early adulthood and is present in various situations. These individuals are very demanding in their relationships.

Avoidant - socially inhibited, feels inadequate, and is oversensitive to criticism

Dependent - shows an extreme need to be taken care of that leads to fears of separation, and passive and clinging behaviour.

Obsessive-Compulsive - preoccupied with orderliness, perfectionism, and control at the expense of flexibility, openness, and efficiency.

 

I’m shocked! Anyone who knows me knows about my OCD! And I avoid everything like the plague! This must mean I really AM going crazy for not knowing these things! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!

On the other hand, they’re spot on about the narcissism and the histrionics.

To Sir, With Love

Thank you, sir, for everything. For the kind words, for the time you spent on this lump of coal. Thank you for your booming, sporadic and uncontrolled laughter. Thank you for your advice and help, but more importantly, your guidance and wisdom. Thank you for showing me the strength it takes to be who you are. Thank you for showing me that everything I want to be is possible. Thank you for reaffirming my faith in who I am now.

Thank you, sir, for giving me someone to call ‘sir’ in that place. I fear it will turn into little more than a dark, glass shell for me now. But thank you for the ray of light you shone there.

You will be missed, sir. You are missed.

I hope we shall sit across each other at a table again some day, beer in hand, discussing obscure literature, advertising, writing, the blues (both life and music) and Pink Floyd.

Here’s to Pub-going, Loose and Forward Women

I’m all for this. In view of the acts of outraged homosexuals in Mangalore, it is time to stand up for what we believe in.

It is time to test the whole ‘Love shall set the world free’ theory. And here’s how.

Send a pair of cheap pink chaddies to the Sri Ram Sena. If you don’t own a pair, no biggie. Buy one. It could be one of those cheap ones that you get at roadside stalls near Andheri Station. Or the lacy type. The specifics, I leave to you.

To know how to go about it, visit The Pink Chaddi Campaign and make your voice heard.

Innovative add-on ideas are also absolutely welcome.

So if you own a pair of bright pink chuds, please, do send them in. If you don’t, be a dear and buy one.

If you’re like me - neither owning, nor brave enough to go buy a pair of pink drawers in broad daylight - spread the word. Help the good women of this country spread the love and turn the other cheek. Erm…. in a completely non-disgusting way.

India answers about that embarrassing ‘10$ Laptop’ business

So about a week ago, the Indian Education Ministry set the tech world aflutter by announcing the launch of its 10$ Laptop to help poor, underprivileged children have access to information more easily.

Yay! for Arjun Singh! There were respectful whispers everywhere of the brightest of minds from IIT-Madras and IISc Bangalore coming together to create this magical device that would surely set India on the path to righteousness and glory.

 

And then they launched this.

Umm… Wait… is this a bad picture of my last internet router?

Oh, no. That’s actually what they launched. That thing is the Education Ministry’s idea of a laptop. But hey, at least it costs just 10$, right? We’ll see about that. First, let’s see how the world took being mocked.

Fox News had a thing or two to say about our wonderful creation. Choice words, and I don’t grudge them.

Rediff news, on the other hand, seemed to think we were quite the bee’s knees.

The Times of India (a paper I’ve lost a lot of respect for in recent times, though this redeems them just a bit) saw through the bullshit, though.

Gizmodo, the gadget blog, in two separate articles, called the ‘10$ Laptop’ a ‘big, dumb joke’ and ‘a complete bust’.

 

So what possible explanation could our dear government have for releasing a ‘laptop’ that needs to be plugged into a computer or laptop to work (heard of thumbdrives/pendrives/flashdrives/USB storage devices, anyone? I thought not)?   I demand one, really. And has our government ever failed us? Ha! A laughable notion, that!

Their excuse? It was a typo. They meant 100$.

Of course! They meant to do the usual by releasing that piece of garage junk for 100$, not 10$.

Of course.

Narcissism Anyone?

So I’ve just been told about (and in that, invited to add my blog to) this "Best Mumbai Blog Competition", being done by http://www.mumbaibloggers.net/

What say? Shall we make mountains out of molehills and sign up? Or remain under clouds of obscurity?

Meh… What’s the worst it could do? Send me traffic? = p

Fine, I’ll put it up, I know you want me to…

Oh, and Muduu, this is me officially informing you.

Where Are You From?

I have lost count of the number of times I have been asked this question. The idea behind it has always escaped me. Every time I move into a new social setting, unfailingly, someone asks it of me. I hate it, from the very core of my being. What is it supposed to determine?

I never give a straight answer. Mostly, I just ask people to guess; seeing how there are just 28 states in the country, you can only really go wrong 27 times. Unless I’m from a Union Territory, in which case, I can snag you on a technicality. Even then, that’s just 7 more.

But since it is such a popular question, here is the answer.

 

 

I come from a father who never shied away from using humour and sarcasm on his children, schooling them both for life and in intelligence. From a man who never brought his work home with him. A man who, whether he knows it or not, taught me to love grammar as I do.

I come from a mother who fiercely protected (and continues to attempt to protect) her children from every evil in the world, and succeeded for the most part of fifteen years. From a woman who poured her love for music into me for as long as I can remember.

I come from a family, from cousins who treated me as most people treat only their friends, as equals in all respects. From endless games of Boggle and Teen Patti played late into the night. From a group of like-minded, yet distinct individuals who subconsciously brought out the best in each other. I come from fifteen different music tastes melded into one.

I come from twelve years of everyday sport, of cricket, football, badminton and table tennis. I come from a childhood spent diving on grass, mud, gravel, shale and asphalt alike. I come from fifteen years spent running barefoot, over whatever the terrain may offer.

Last, and definitely nor the least, I come from surprisingly large groups of surprisingly close friends; at home, in school and through my three colleges. From theosophical discussions and professor bashing in dusty lecture halls.

That is where I come from.

I am NOT a copywriter

Though my designation would have you believe so, don't listen or be fooled. I pretend to be one. And I've gotten so good at convincing people that I am one, I sometimes fool myself. But every now and then, a really great line comes my way and reminds me of what I'm degrading by posing as a copywriter.

Then what compels me to make so great a confession? I've just seen a whole bunch of these wonderful lines all in the same place. I've collected them here for you to feel the presence of greatness yourselves. You will know, undoubtedly, at a mere glance, where to find yourself such brilliance in the copywriting profession.

Give her pleasure with every stroke - we assure you, it's no joke
Don't let the unsatisfying size of your friend steal your manhood.
Click everybody

Your manliness has never been bigger.
Every woman is dieing to sleep with a well-endowed man.

Get better in making it with her
You can be the best bed partner ever with our natural male assistant.

Get smashing love power
The best and easiest way to improve your lovemaking
is the improvement of your love instrument.

A man with a big member has a shining look on his face.
Every extra inch down there brings more pleasure to her and more confidence to you.
Come At This Moment

Boost your men power.
All medications to cure yourself!
Clicke HERE !

Gift perfect sexual life to your girlfriend.
Few steps to become healthy!

In case you thought they only talked about one thing, you're wrong. These guys are versatile.

Add a touch of class to your life style with extremely high quality replica watches

But it's these lines that follow that brought me almost to tears with their absolute brilliance.

Girls will drop underwear for you
Show your woman high peaks of pleasure and she will worship your unique abilities.

You'll call it Peter the Great
Give woman the first thing she expects from you - the unforgetable pleasure.

Give your rocket best fuel
Make your love locomotive enter her tunnel on a full speed.

*kowtow*

My Lovely Little World

I exist only in my head. My world is in my head. It is a wonderful world. It's like clockwork. It's beautiful. It's an amazing place to be. It keeps me happy. It also defines me.

I know this.

Try as much as you want, you can't get in there. Not unless I let you in. Only trouble is, you won't know you're there. You see, if I've let you in, I've completely forgotten to tell you you're there. Because if I think you deserve to be there, I also think I don't need to tell you you're there.

Which begs another question. If you're in my world, and you don't even know that you're there, does that mean that all there is of you in my world is an idea of you? And if this is true, do I really care for you, or for the idea of you?
I hope I am, at last, naked before my own eyes. I can dig no further.

The Old Man, His Bed Partner & Their Third Wheel

Retrospect, that old, sadistic geezer, hooked up with long time beau Wisdom, and together with their partner in crime and mockery, Lady Luck, decided to whip up a potent little batch of something to blow my eyes and my mind open. If I get the time in the next few days, I'll explain.


Talk about making a felicitous start to the year.

Purging

He wouldn't turn to the spirits. He wasn't that far gone yet. Yet his mind weighed him down like an anchor. No, he thought, not now. There would come a time and a place for that. That moment was neither.

He closed his mind. Detached from himself. And he let loose. For hours, he just was. No thoughts, no considerations, nothing. Even when he felt his body protest, burn, scream, he did not stop. No, he thought, not now. There would come a time and a place for that. That moment was neither.

Sweet Oblivion, Here I Come.

Trust work to help me out in this regard.

This is going to be hellmonth. More hellmonth than the one I've mentioned before. Gah. Life is going to get even more difficult, I can see it coming.

Smoke And Dust

I eagerly await the day the human species wipes itself off the face of the planet. It'll make living a lot easier for ourselves and everyone else.

I'm not going to post about the terror incidents in Mumbai; to me, that's like insulting the gravity of it.

Hopefully, I'll be able to put something up here again soon.