Sunday, 10 May 2009

Moron Couldn’t Keep His Birdie(s) Hidden

imageA man was arrested on Wednesday for attempting to smuggle 14 birds from Vietnam into the US [link]. He was nabbed when an airport inspector with a wayward glance spotted copious amounts of bird poo on his socks (the journalist would like to assure you that he really wishes he were making this up).

It is still unclear how and why said official came to be inspecting the perpetrator’s socks in the first place. Foot fetish has not been ruled out as a possible alternative.

Investigators believe the smuggler, one Sony Dong, was motivated by deep hatred of his own name and a latent inability to keep it in his pants. Not the name, that is.

Animal rights activists across the world have condemned the incident. On the other hand, Human Rights organizations across the board have unanimously stood up in support of Dong, saying a man thus named could not possibly be blamed for his actions. Legal experts close to the incident expect Dong to plead insanity and mental trauma caused by being named after a large reproductory organ , a product that rivals the male (see defn. #9) and a horrifically valueless currency.

In what is being seen as a shocking fallout, indicative of the trauma they went through, none of the birds involved have tweeted about the incident.

5 member protest rally:

Mudra said...

Hahahaha... Loved the last line!

Preeti said...

A point of concern that i feel in context with this piece of news is the dysfunctioning of the mind that drove that man to such extremities. And the poor little birds.

And I read that he's been released on bail.

There are so many permutations at play here. Although i feel bad for him, i wonder if he's just a plain, mean, man who enjoys torturing defenseless beings. but even then it is ultimately a distortion of the brain that pushes him into it.

And capitalizing on this incident are the different lobbyists who take every presented opportunity to blow their trumpets. Or you have some new fashionably exciting psychological disorder being hollered out, therefore diluting the fundamentals from the picture.

At the end of it you are left with a sense of disorientation as to what was meant to be reported. I mean what are we supposed to take away from it.

PS: At least you've ended it on a light note which is very signaturely YOU. It has succeeded in softening the blow a bit.

PPS: Whew! that was a veritable sermon. I'm sorry to have taken up so much of your space, Jayant!

ki said...

I liked it! It had me laughing by the end of the post!

Preeti said...

Jayant, i happened to share this with a couple of friends. you have unknowingly satirized the entire incident. and it provoked thoughts that led to a not-so-pleasant debate.
i guess we have a choice wherein we could take this lightly and enjoy the humour. or we could use the interpretation to trigger off speculations, surmises, conjectures, debates...
and action???
oh well....

PS: i think i just messed up the post, right??? :P
if its any solace you've got some more people who are gonna keep track of your posts.

PPS: your style of expression (in context with the words that you employ) can be very crisp and crystal clear at times.

Jhayu said...

@ Muduu.
Why thanks for noticing! =p

@ Preeti.
Yeah, that was a big one. Even by your standards =p Damn.

@ ki.
Well, in that case, mission accomplished. =)

@ Preeti again.
At the risk of sounding repetitive,
Well, in that case, mission accomplished. =)
Good to know I'm stirring up debates and whatnot.
And when was the last time you heard me complain about people reading my blog? =p

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