Sunday, 9 May 2010

The Devil & The Deep Sea

Every morning, my parents wage a war. An epic battle with one simple aim. Waking me. They take it in turns. One is effective but lazy, the other persistent as hell.

Mom's modus operandi is simple. Yell 'Get up' / 'Utho' or some other derivative of the same in her loud, scary, kindergarten-teacher voice.

Unfortunately, this appeals to the eternally-eight-year-old in me. Yes, that stubborn, never-do-what-you're-told eight-year-old. And I stay under the sheets, stuff my head under a pillow, only to have her repeat the cycle till I groggily tumble out of bed.

Dad, on the other hand, comes and sits on the bed next to me. Gives me a back massage. While I'm still half asleep, he asks (and I'm sure he's perfectly aware this is the best time to get an answer out of me) what's happening with me.

And somewhere, completely casually, he'll slip in one of those scary questions; the kind that are hard-wired to set off alarm bells ringing in your head. Questions like 'How much money is in your bank account?' And suddenly, my eyes are wide open, my mind completely alert. Somehow, I deflect his question and shoo him away. But I'll be damned if I can go back to sleep after that.

I'm not sure which I prefer.

11 member protest rally:

Avantika A. said...

Lol! My mum would start singing and dad would switch off the fan/ac. Finally had to stop telling them what time i had to leave!

ps: Word verification word: snazi. Means something you think? :P

jhayu said...

That'll work only if you've got truly flexible timings. Mom knows what the latest I can wake up is if I want to get to work at something remotely approaching a decent time.

Shreya said...

awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! You need this! http://www.nandahome.com/products/index.php

Mom and dad can stay out of this then :P

Oh, and I wonder why you wouldn't want people to 'follow' you! I'll try and come back in here!

Mudra said...

My mom!! She wakes me up either by telling me gossip about the relatives/neighbours or trying to get gossip outta me!!

jhayu said...

@ Shreya.
Hola! Yeah, that might work. Closest to that I had was the alarm on my old Nokia 3310, which required me to unlock the keypad, find the menu item and then switch off the alarm. Worked wonders. Gift? *innocent, angelic smile*
And you may have a point. It has been reinstated. =)

@ Muduu.
Ooooh! That's a good one. I'll probably use that one myself.

apoorva said...

This is really funny which is unfortunate because I started laughing sitting in office and then my boss passed by giving me a dirty look. Ah well. My mum used to do the same thing, but my dad would just lean on my sleeping form more and more till I was squished, in pain and very awake.

jhayu said...

@ Apoorva.
Hehehe.. My dad couldn't try that. He's a featherweight. =P
REALLY nice blog theme you got there, by the way.
How'd you stumble across this in your office, though?

apoorva said...

I just got in at work - totally soaked, stupid rain - and was looking for Bombay blogs for a feature story I'm trying to do.

Then the inevitable happened and I got totally sidetracked going through your site.

jhayu said...

@ Apoorva.
Yeah, it was a soppy day. But how'd you come across my blog in the first place? I don't have very many Bombay-centric posts.

And I am very flattered.

apoorva said...

I was searching for phrases like 'best Bombay blog' (lazy, I know) and I think you had written at some point about entering a competition which was about something like that, so it showed up in the results. And no problem about the praise, I will stalk through the rest of your blog on another boring workday.

jhayu said...

@ Apoorva.
I shall look forward to it!

Post a Comment

Talk, my friend. Now that you've read this section, the urge to speak has increased. I know. It's all right. It happens...
Stop fighting it. Talk.