A scientific study has been released suggesting that a chimpanzee named Santino is smarter than an ex-President of a certain superpower.
In fact, so intelligent is this primate, that he manages to chuck rocks at people, and make them love him for it. The former President of whom we speak has been quoted as being “amazed that one of ’em little people” could pull off such a task. It is believed his representatives are attempting to contact the zoo authorities where Santino currently lives in order to relocate the chimp to his Texas residence.
In response, the ex-President’s successor reportedly said, “I’m no one to stop long-lost brothers from being united.”